Still Growing Up

I'm 57 years old and that is a true fact, at least according to important official raised-seal type documents.  But what do they know - dusty, papery, yellowed documents.  The truer fact is I don't FEEL Fifty-Seven.  Fifty-seven feels a lot older than this.  Right?   I mean I thought I'd be a whole lot wiser by now and way more knowledgeable as to how the world really works.  Oh, and I thought I'd be really mature by now too with really mature and sophisticated opinions that I could pass off as Facts at the drop of a hat.  And I certainly thought I'd be a good bit more cynical and way less gullible and definitely prone to over-analyzing everything and being a giant scoffer of things.  But, that isn't what's going on. Yet.  Maybe it will sometime later, on down the road, but for now I'd have to say that at 57 years old, I'm still growing up. 

This was again made crystal clear, this being fifty-seven but not feeling like it, just a couple days ago when I was at a matinee movie with my on-spring-break-son Steve.  He and I were on a "date"  -  lunch and a movie, just the two of us, 57 year old mother and 19 year old son with Down syndrome. This sort of outing with my Steve is rare.  Lots of dominoes have to be in the right place for this to fall just right.  A two hour block of time is one domino.  Another domino is the absence of the impromptu, inexplicable stomach ailment as the young movie-goer settles into his seat in the theater. Yet another domino is the movie itself, specifically, the rating of the movie. 

As a rule, PG, maybe PG-13, is about as risky as we go when venturing to the movie theater with Steve or his 17 year old brother Tom.  It's on account of their propensity for parroting spicy words and R-rated phrases!  The two of them, teenagers with Down syndrome, have a spicy-word radar mechanism that kicks in anywhere words are spoken - they hear it all in school hallways and cafeterias, the ball park, and the grocery store, the car next to us at the stop light on a hot, windows-down summer day, even the long line behind us in the Christmas-time post office - words just fly everywhere, anytime, in real life.  I suppose the provocation behind the words should be taken into account, but my boys don't do that; they don't analyze or dig for cuss-causes like Angst, Aggravation, Anger.  They don't parrot that stuff, they just parrot the zingy, spicy words that are heard rather frequently nowadays here and there in real life and in reel life as well.  At the movies. And so with the movie-rating domino being PG a couple days ago - we were good to go and so we went.

There was an unrelenting cold wind blowing all over the place that day.  It was sharp and rude feeling against my face and Steve's face too so we hunkered into our coats and hurried across the parking lot to the theater entrance.   The sharpness and rudeness of the outside world completely vanished, not even a dim memory of it, during the entire two hours of the PG movie.  The movie, the fairy tale story, absolutely swept me in and swept me away in a comfortable, cozy, warm familiar way.  The story itself is very familiar to me, to most everyone I'm pretty sure.  I've known the characters, the plot, the ending, all of it practically my entire 57 years.  Yet, it swept me in and swept me away.  As for Steve, he was in a linguistic safe haven - not a single zingy, spicy word throughout the entire two hours.  All the dominoes had fallen just right.  And it was none other than Disney's recent version of the old Cinderella fairy tale story that managed to sweep the two of us into that magically, cozily familiar haven. 



I can't and I won't analyze it, critique it, or cynically scoff at it as I suppose I should seeing as how I'm 57 years old and all.  But I just can't and I just won't.  And I won't give you a world-weary, sophisticated opinion about it either the reason being my 57ness melted clean away regarding this beautiful fairy tale movie.  I admit it; I'm not sophisticated and I'm not world-weary either.  It's because I haven't grown up yet.




"...have courage and be kind.  It'll help see you through the trials that life can offer." (Ella's mother)

Spring Break here, there, not yet, and t/here!

Spring Break Here...

First Day of Spring Break for Steve

That's my only at-home Spring Breaker giving his "Keep Calm and Sail On" thumbs up to the decidedly un-spring breaky wintry-mix going on behind him in the backyard.  It's pouring down snow here in Illinois on this March Monday - which isn't all that unusual, so say the professional weather people and their historical data - but for non-professional, "what the heck, one week ago it was 70 and sunny here" type of folks, it's notable and noticeable - so I'm noting and noticing the pouring down of the snow on Steve's first day of spring break.  He's all thumbs about it, he's just that kind of guy - mostly a go-with-the-flow, even keel, keep calm and sail on young man.  I don't think he chose that shirt to wear today for its imprinted message. I think he picked it out because he was being practical: the shirt is warm and cozy and the day is blowy and snowy.

Speaking of that shirt, while its message, in my opinion, perfectly captures Steve's take on life, it actually is "spirit wear" from his school - the one he's spring breaking from this week.  S.A.I.L. is the  name of the post high school program he attends - it's his "college."  And on the back of his shirt it says:

Spring Break There...

Oh my goodness, so okay, while on the subject of SAIL and things nautical and spring break, one of my other sons, the one who is a midshipman out east, is just today back in classes after his spring break from the Naval Academy. The details, heck the broad outline even, of his spring break adventures in Florida's Disney World with several of his midshipmen friends, I'll never know.  But then that's the way it should be, must be, when you factor in the spring breakers' ages, their collectively earned trust, and most obviously, that apron-string-severing fact that "they're Uncle Sam's now!" Even with all that, I can't stop being Mom so when I received a text, albeit a very brief one, from my midshipman son late last night saying he was back on the Yard in Annapolis, I once again was calm and able to sail on, off to sleep.

Spring Break Here, but not yet for you...

For the first time ever my youngest's spring break does not coincide with his big brother Steve's spring break.  Tommy's break is NEXT week and he was not really all about it when at 6:15 this morning I'm rousting him, and only him, out of bed into the get-ready-for-school move-it-move-it-move-it mode.  "But Steeeeve," he lamented.  "Nope," I told him, "Steve has spring break all week, starting today."  That the brothers share a room and Tom has to walk by Steve's bed to get to the bathroom to get ready for school even when Steve gets the whole week off - hmmmm, let me just say that some shenanigans sort of ensued during the walk-by.  Ahhhhh....it was all in good, brotherly fun.  Sort of.  Anyway, Sail On!

Spring Break T/here...

The oldest of my six lives just up the road, only about a half hour away, and that I must say is just the best! Over the years as the 4 older kids have left to live their lives, to make their way in the big wonderful world out there, to do what they were meant to do, and what they chose to do - I have stood in awe and sat in quiet heartbreak - I miss them desperately, and I am desperately happy for each of them, and all that desperate sitting and standing and heartbreaking happiness goes on all at once somehow.  I'm pretty sure it's a Middle-Aged Parent sort of phenomenon and since I'm definitely Middle-Aged it's okay for me to have that phenomenon. Anyway, having my oldest just a quick drive up the road is wonderful - he and the others who are on their own have lived far, far away at times.  Other states, other countries.  But for now, my oldest is just in another town.  And he's on spring break this week from the high school in which he teaches special ed and coaches the school's track team.  It was so nice on Saturday when he and his fiancee came over for dinner - just like that, zip zip in the car and up our street and into our kitchen to hang about and set the table, chop some vegetables, boil some noodles, eat, talk, laugh - it's the best!  So with my oldest on spring break and just up the road and my next to youngest on spring break right here in the house, we may, just may, the three of us together have an adventure or two this week.

Spring Break 2015 - Whether you've had your break or it's coming or it's right now or you don't get one anymore - I send you all prayers for staying safe today and always!  Take care and God bless.

Karen

TWENTY ONE!!!!

March 21, 2015

aaahhh...it's the family room! 

Today, the 21st of March, I'm putting the Family Room into the blog world!

The Family Room - this blog one is a lot like the real room in my real house with the same name. It's  an "aaahhh" kind of place - easy, comfortable, sit down, relax a minute kind of place. Children dash in and out, there's noise, good noise, and windows to see out, books to see in, a big chair to sit on.  Mostly pleasant things come into this room, and if they're not mostly pleasant then at least they need to be a little funny.  There'll be no harsh stuff, no really sad stuff - that has to stay out - because I said so.   And I've chosen today, the 21st, as the Family Room blog launch date because, well... let me show you:

First of all the Family Room is 21 years old this year.  It was way back in 1994 that I dreamed up the Family Room.  And it was 1994 that my crazy dream materialized - as a real-live weekly newspaper column!  This is what it and I looked like back then:

 

Back then I was a Mom of 4, my oldest was 10 (he's now a special ed teacher) and my youngest, back then, was a newborn (he's now a midshipman at the United States Naval Academy).  In 1994 I wrote about what I knew then - being a Mom to 4 (3 of whom have gone on to serve in the military! Who knew?!  Certainly not me, not back then!).  Anyway, other things I knew about and so wrote about: being a wife and a daughter-in-law for 13 years, being a daughter and a sister for 37 years, being a best friend for 30 years, and being a dreamer-upper from the very start.  The editors of the newspapers carrying my column said, "Go ahead, write about all of it!"  And I did; I wrote about family for family - and all along, the whole time, I was inspired by my family.  As it grew, my horizons grew.

Twenty one years ago my real family room absolutely positively bubbled over with adventure and life and noise and mischief and really good stuff and I just couldn't help it - I just couldn't keep it to myself one more second, and so the Family Room, the column, was born.  Back then and for many years the stories of the Family Room were printed in real ink on real, crinkly, foldable newsprint paper that wound up on real porches or real puddles at the ends of driveways in several towns in the United States.  And today, 21 years later, on the 21st of the month, in this, the 21st century - my newspaper column is celebrating its 21st birthday and at the same time transforming itself into a 21st century blog.  So there it is -  Happy Blogday Birthday Family Room!


I've timed the blog launch of my 21 year old Family Room for today (3 - 21) for another reason.  Today is World Down Syndrome Day and my two youngest (child #5 and child #6 born during the Family Room-in-the-newspaper years) have Down syndrome.  All over the world and in my very own family room a celebration is underway today of those who have that 3rd copy of the 21st chromosome in each cell of their bodies.  I've actually been celebrating Down syndrome every day for the past 19 years - Steve was born in '96 and celebrating him and his journey has been so humbling and gratifying and wonderful and inspiring and easy and difficult and .... well, simply put, a joy like no other.  And in 1998 my sixth child came along, Tommy.  Tommy is now 17 years old, a junior in high school, an enthusiastic basketball player, a league bowler, a track and field medal winner, a techno-gadget whiz kid. These two boys are the youngest of my six children and like the four older ones, they have been inspirers and adventurers and mischief makers and life affirmers - and, like their older siblings, they were and will be again featured characters in many a  Family Room story.   Here they are gathered together in a rare photo -  my Family Room's featured characters: its inspirers, adventurers, mischief makers, its life affirmers - all in one spot!

In the 21 years since the Family Room was born many things have changed.   For instance, the very location of the real family room (we've moved three times: from Michigan to Illinois to Ohio back to Illinois) And then with the 3 of my 6 in the military, the question of how many months pass before we can gather again, and how many time zones and oceans separate us this time, and what time is good to Skype.  In my real family room I've seen the number of diplomas increase and the addition of a wedding album on the table, and the "I Love Nana" picture frame holding a picture of my granddaughter and me.

So much life has gone on and will go on, so many adventures, so much inspiration bubbling over, still, even after 21 years.



                                                                                                         
                                     

Til next time, take care and God bless. Karen